Barney Bard, the Trump Administration’s own official, if a bit giddy, Gadfly, has released the following:

Unpleasant contemplation — technical difficulties at a “fart to the music” concert.

People that claim to be spiritual — just lazy fucks unwilling to adhere to the rules of organized religion.

Liberals — Conservatives yet to be mugged by an Obamanaut. Unless of course a past assault involved a same-sex bare-bottom spanking.

Brexit — too little, too late, too bad.

Another unpleasant contemplation — if former Secretary of State, John Kerry, were to develop a hormonal imbalance, become awfully hirsute, and then — gasp! — committed suicide, how would the Japanese papers report the tragedy? Maybe “Hairy Kerry commits Hari-kari.”